initiative at work and babysitting at home
2005-07-11, 9:59 a.m.

Happy Monday morning. Well I started of this morning with a bang. I got an email inviting me to a HUGE meeting of the powers that be and asking if I had anything to add to the agenda...me! Yes, baby, you've arrived. So, not wanting to show my ignorance, I decided to ask my boss to explain the purpose of the meeting, their scope, and objectives. Turns out, if I had made the suggestion that I wanted to make, I'd have looked the fool. Good thing I did not jump off that cliff. But, I am officially invited to this meeting which is set for August 1. This will be the first time I am in the same room with this many power figures....intimidating yes, but also very stimulating.

I also took the initiative to speak to my boss on a policy change I'd like to make, and he wants me to submit some examples of what I am speaking of before he makes a decision.

Of course, while I was in there, I asked about moving to my new desk. It seems we're just waiting for the new computer to be hooked up, so I left the meeting and contacted the IT department and they're working on it!

So Monday morning and I'm productive! Whoo Hoo.

This weekend was okay. Eagle and I had her 15 year old cousin over for the weekend. Eagle had been banned from spending time alone with her cousin because she has used very poor judgment in the past by allowing her cousin to smoke pot, keep her out all night, take her down to Detroit to buy pot, etc. So since I've been there, I am their "chaperone" and finally her aunt let her and I keep her cousin for the weekend. Eagle was better. Though she did offer her cousin a joint, which the cousin refused. I gave Eagle hell for it, and gave the cousin great kudo's. She said she does not smoke pot anymore. Yeah for her.

They kept me up till 4:00 a.m. playing board games, finally I was too tired and went to bed. They then went out on a mischief making quest. I won't say what they did, though it was harmless, it was still illegal and I was PISSED.

The cousin's mother only knew about one of the things they did, which was put forks in the ground at her parent's house and grease them with crisco. And she was not too happy. I felt responsible, but her aunt let me off the hook. She said, you can't watch them all the time. But I told her that I gave them both hell and she gave them both hell and made them clean up the mess. Which Eagle tried to get out of, but I was having none of that.

Afterward, I was quiet and Eagle kept asking me what is wrong. I didn't want to say anything with her cousin there, I figured we'd talk about it later, but she just kept asking and asking. So finally I told her that it took her nearly a year to be allowed to have her cousin over unsupervised, and she showed a HUGE lack of responsibility. I was not really angry, but surprised and disappointed by her behavior. She was sort of stunned into silence, when turned in to sulking. But I got my point across and hopefully to her cousin as well. Her cousin has many problems already, she does not need to add to them. Eagle needs to be a positive role model to her, not a partner in crime.

So it was a bit like babysitting all weekend, but it was okay. I have glimmers of hope here and there that things with Eagle and I can be okay. We do seem to fall back into our connection well. She knows that she's on thin ice with me, and she hasn't freaked out about it. She understands. She knows that most people would have left by now, I am unique and more patient than most, but I'm not perfect and I'm not going to put up with it forever. I know she realizes this...I can only hope that it keeps her focused on moving forward and not looking back.

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