time will tell
2003-09-09, 10:45 a.m.

Wow I almost forgot to post an entry today. What's up with that?

So yeah, MyexLove sent me flowers yesterday and I was less than thrilled. Don't get me wrong, I thanked her and stuff, but it just seemed so impersonal. Like she's saying...oh I'll whip out the credit card and send her some roses and she'll be quiet for awhile. What I would have preferred is an email telling me she loves me, or a card sent through the mail, or even if she was going to send flowers that she send MY favorite flowers, not her favorite. I like tulips and I've told her that....oh hell maybe I'm just making excuses because I don't want to admit that I just might not be feeling the love for her anymore.

Speaking of love.....I'm starting to feel the stirrings inside of me for Eagle. Yes, I'm fighting them for the most part. But I am also letting my guard down slowly with her. I do trust her. She is very honest with me. I am enjoying watching her become the responsible adult that she set out to become before she even met me. She starts a new job on Wednesday and she is very excited about it. I am proud of her.

I just really need to go slowly to make sure that the feelings i have for her are not just rebound feelings or displaced feelings.

And back to MyexLove.....I kind of want to let her go, but I don't.....not sure what I'm doing there...so I'll stick to my mantra of making no decisions right now.

Time will tell.

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