Not easy to live with....you think?
2005-02-08, 9:18 a.m.

Well it was a good night. No fighting. Well not much at least. We really didn't fight, she just gets very distressed over such little things sometimes, and then she works herself into a tizzy. Meanwhile, I'm calm.

She just cannot stand to have anyone who lives with her not be under her complete control. That's what it comes down too. And I told her that. I told her that her issues are HER issues with my sister and she's either got to let them go, or we need to help my sister find somewhere else to live. Because I am not going to listen to her liteny of outrageous complaints day in and day out. It's crazy.

She wants my sister to find a job, okay, so do I. I feel like she's looking, Eagle doesn't think she's looking "hard enough." Then she says that she doesn't want to be her taxi service. Okay, so she wants her to find a job, but she's not going to drive her to or from said job. So that limits where she can look. She complains because my sister comes upstairs in the morning and just sits on the couch. Yet she complains when she goes back downstairs and avoids Eagle. How can both things piss someone off? She hates when we run the dishwasher too much, yet if we don't run it, then we're slacking. She wants people to talk to her about any issues, yet when they do, she gets testy...especially if she's eating. It's a no win situation. For me, I've finally learned out to deal with it and with her. But my sister shouldn't have to. It took all I could muster not to say, "I told you so" last night. Because I did. I told them BOTH before they moved in that this was not a good idea. But they BOTH assured me that it was no problem.....yeah right.

Now I get to listen to Eagle vent, I get to try and smooth shit out, etc. But I'm not going to anymore. Last night my sister came upstairs when she knew Eagle was in the kitchen and told me her plans to stay out for the night with her friend and take the bus to the mall to look for a job. Of course Eagle was the one that was supposed to drive her to the mall, and I don't blame Eagle for being angry that she told me all of this, and not her. So I told my sister she needs to talk it out with Eagle. I'm out of the middle of this anymore. They are both adults, and they can talk it out between themselves.

And for Eagle's part she really has acted differently with my sister. She has apologized when she's overreacted, which is a huge thing. And I know that my sister is sometimes prone to drama and twisting things around herself. So the two of them can hammer this out. I'm out of it. At least I hope so.

Personally, I'm doing pretty good. I see so much progress in Eagle. I truly do. She has a her setbacks, don't get me wrong, but they are happening less and less, and for short periods of time. Her maturity level is still not that of a 34 year old woman, but probably mid to early 20's. She IS getting there. I do have faith. Still.

Unfortunately, I think that dark period of PMS is right around the corner. It will be a true miracle the day that she can go through PMS without getting overly irrational and cranky. That remains to be seen.

Like last night, we laid in bed, and things were great. Then out the blue she tensed up, I put my hand on her leg, and she took it off and said, "not now I'm crabby." So I just said nothing, then a minute later she turned to me and said, "now I feel guilty." I said, "you should." She needs to learn that she is not the center of the universe. Just because she does not get her way, or whatever other reason, she cannot just do or say whatever she wants without hurting the person she loves. Period. And she's getting it. She truly is getting it.

Well that's about it for now. I'm tired and I wish that my sister would find a job and an apartment soon. Eagle is just not equipped to live with others, at least not for long periods of time. It took us nearly a year to iron out our kinks, and we're still ironing. She is not an easy person to live with.

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