good questions
2004-04-06, 4:26 p.m.

Another quick entry. Spoke a few times to MyLove today. I think she's starting to get her walls back up. Afraid that I might say its over.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. It is what I expected her to do. And quite honestly, that behavior will only push me further away. I'm tired of trying to break down her walls and defenses. Tired of prodding her into loving me the way I want. Tired of forcing her to love me.

If she wants to keep me, the only way she can is to lay herself bare to me. Draw me into her. Make me feel loved and cherished. I know that she CAN do that. She has done it in the past, but not really sure if she wants to now.

Maybe she's feeling as ambivilant as me. Yes, we love each other. But is it worth the struggle? Are we just TOO different to make it work? Those are some good questions that I just don't have the answers to.

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