sleepy but great
2004-04-28, 9:13 a.m.

Boy am I sleepy today. Not really sure why. I went to bed before midnight. Had some great sex before I fell asleep. Was woken up before the alarm with a hot cup of coffee and a wonderful back rub. Now there�s something that�s NEVER happened before.

Eagle is back to being the Eagle I know and love. We talked about what happened this weekend. She fully admits that taking the Xanax was a very bad idea and is what caused most of the turmoil. She apologized for everything and we discussed both of our reactions to different events. I told her that she turned into a person I did not know, and frankly didn�t really like all that much. I asked her if when she was in that state was she aware of what was happening? I suggested that we practice some meditation and pick a word or a phrase that we can use as a trigger to calm her down when she is in the state of panic. She agreed.

I�m glad that I chose to stay home alone on Monday night. I needed to get myself grounded and remind myself that I did not have to be in the middle of her drama if I didn�t want to be. I�m proud of myself. I think I handled it well. I�m also happy that I finally told her that I�m not comfortable with the idea of moving in with her yet. Sometimes it seems like a great idea, but other times I realize that right now I need a place to call my own.

So today I�m feeling great. Sleepy, but still great.

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