Sleepy, anxious, and excited
2004-06-17, 8:35 a.m.

Man I am so tired lately. It doesn't seem to matter what time I go to bed. I'm tired all the time.

I watched Last Comic Standing last night. I was pissed. The funniest guy didn't make it. He got a standing ovation from the whole place including the judges. But didn't make it. Brett Butler and Drew Carey were two of the judges and they were pissed too. But then the producer explained that unbeknownst to them, there were three producers also voting. Seems that they could have told them this beforehand, don't you think? Drew Carey said, "I call bullshit!" And I agree. But I'll keep watching the show I'm sure.

So other than that, I had a nice relaxing evening. Went to bed early with the air off and woke up at 5:00 am sweating. Not a nice way to wake up.

My shower in my apartment sucks so bad that I have to take a bath every morning. I've already reported it, but so far, no one has come to fix it. Ah the joys of apartment life.

I've been thinking lately that after my lease is up, I think I want to buy something of my own. Probably a condo, but maybe a small house. I feel the need to do that. But I've got a year till my lease is up, so no daydreaming about it yet.

I've got therapy tonight. I plan to talk about my anxiety. Last night as I watched T.V. I started to get this anxiety attack. I soon had myself convinced that I had some incurable disease. It didn't help that my grandma called me because she had a premonition that wasn't feeling well. Hmmmm.

Okay I don't want any lectures. But I have a date Friday night. I'm really excited because it's a real date. She's coming to pick me up, take me to dinner, then to the club. I've never really had a date like that before. I've already told her I'm not looking for a commitment or a relationship right now. She's cool with that. I just really want to experience what it's like to actually date. And date several people at once. I'm allowed.

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