How to show her
2006-06-28, 9:21 a.m.

Last night we dug out the digital camera and took some pics of our Nikki (the dog). Unfortunately my gold membership has expired, but if you want to see the pics, click here to view them at webshots.

So I'm doing okay. I'm sick of being in pain though. I can't wait till the day when I can walk without pain. But at least I am walking; slowly and with great pain, but I AM walking.

Tomorrow I go back to the doctor, so I won't be at work. Hopefully I'll find out when he wants to take out the screws. The sooner the better in my book. I want this behind me quickly.

Eagle is doing great. I mean really great, and I'm torn. I'm afraid that praising her too much will give her ammo to mess up (it's happened in the past), but I don't want to not give her the positive re-enforcement. I'm trying to balance it out. I wish that I could do something for her that she's been wanting. Namely, going to a hotel for a weekend, but the budget is just in no shape for that for awhile. I try to think of something to write to her, but nothing really comes. I think that I've been disappointed by her behavior so many times, that a BIG part of me is afraid that she will disappoint me again. Therefore, I can't come up with the mushy romantic stuff that I KNOW she wants to hear. I feel bad about it, but I can't manufacture it. If I'm not feeling it, I'm not. Right? Don't get me wrong, I do love her a great deal, I'm just not having those gooey over the top romantic feelings for her. I haven't for awhile based on her behaviors. I hope that at some point they come back, but for now I just don't know what to do to show her that I am proud of her and that she's doing a really great job.

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