Unlocked Once Again
2006-08-16, 9:25 a.m.

Okay I've unlocked now. Hopefully the banning will keep Eagle out of here. Sheesh!

Although I was angry at her for reading my journal and then getting mad at what I wrote, I was very sad that she was hurt. That tells me that I really do love her very much. She has been doing remarkably well. Now that she no longer has a vehicle at home during the day, she cannot go and get pills, so that makes it nice for me to know that she is being clean. AND the last few weekends that she has had the opportunity to take the van and get pills, she has not done so.

I am proud of her and her recovery so far. I think that eventually she can be very productive member of society. She is already a very productive member of our home.

On to another issue. I have got to do something about my weight. My knees are hurting, I'm sick of being out of breath going up a flight of steps. But I SO don't want to start watching what I eat. I know I know. You have to do that to lose weight. But it sucks. I just plain sucks. It's not like a eat horribly now. I eat a bagle and cream cheese for breakfast (I know that's not good), for lunch I have either leftovers from dinner, or a sandwich with some veggie sticks, and then for dinner Eagle usually cooks anything from a roast, to pork loin, chicken thigs, steaks, or like last night swedish meatballs on mashed potatoes. I'm trying really hard to watch portion size, and have limited my pops to one or less a day. But I have to do more, and I don't want to. I just don't want to.

So I'm thinking to get the motivation I need, I should seek some kind of help. I've done the weight watchers thing and didn't like it. I think maybe this time I'll try Medical Weight Loss centers. So that's my gripe for today.

Oh and Happy Birthday Dad. We may not always see eye to eye, but we have been growing closer in the past few months.

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