sigh
2003-08-20, 2:25 p.m.

I can't believe I forgot to update today. My mind is a mess today.

MyexLove called me at 2:30 this morning. We talked till 4:00 a.m. She wants me back. I told her no. I told her actions speak louder than words.

She came over this morning and we talked more. She cried. I asked her what happened to her to make her so scared to love and be loved. She cried a lot. She said she is trying to look at that. I encouraged her. I told her she has a friend in me, but for now, that is all she has.

Then she kissed me and my heart fell to my feet.

Then she asked me if I had to choose all or nothing right now with her, what would it be? I said nothing.

I don't know what I want right now. My heart is racing. I am so afraid to get hurt again. But I love her so much.

Made an emergency appointment with my counsellor tonight....

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