Loving Eagle
2006-10-27, 11:04 a.m.

Well Friday has finally arrived and I cannot be more greatful. I could not have done one more day of this. I swear I couldn't. My leg is aching bad, I just wish it would get back to normal, but I fear that it never will. AT least that's how it feels right now.

I'm very proud of Eagle today. Last night we went and played euchre at the tournament that we sometimes go to. And guess who won! Eagle. She has come a long long way. She really really has. Not just in playing euchre either, but in having the confidence to play with skill, in having the control to go to a bar and not drink. I'm just very proud of her. Last night we had a very intimate evening as we drifted off to sleep and there's nothing like feeling the hands of the one you love caressing your back and body as you drift off to sleep. It's things that that the make me cherish the relationship we have. I've never had that before...and it's truly great.

Okay enough of the mushy stuff. Has anyone noticed that I lost my mushy side after my heart was smashed into a million pieces by my ex? Eagle mentioned to me that when she and I were friends that I used go on and on about Myexlove and how much I loved her and blah blah blah, but with her I'm very reserved and not so mushy...and unfortunately she's right. I think that the whole illusion of the "romance" between me and my ex was shattered so completely no trace of romance lived within me after that. But I'm trying to change that. I want to be the mushy sentimental person I used to be, I really do, so I'm working on it. But there's definitely a big cold part somewhere inside me that needs to be melted!

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