It doesn't matter
2003-11-06, 1:14 p.m.

My motto for the day is "It doesn't matter." My supposed girlfriend didn't call me last night and when I called there was no answer, but....it doesn't matter. This morning I called her, and again there was no answer, but...it doesn't matter. This afternoon, again no answer, but....it doesn't matter. She is supposed to come over and spend the night tonight, but I am pretty confident that she won't, but....it doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter what she does or doesn't do, because I have the confidence and strength in myself to be okay. To not depend on these phone calls or visits from her...and the more I realize that...the closer I am to letting her go.

I sound pessimistic right now, and I don't like that, but sometimes you have to be realistic based on past events.

So no, it doesn't matter in the scheme of life....what matters is me and how I treat myself. I matter.

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